Monday: Three Morning Takes
your boy hasan / the deal guys and dario / bet on yourself
PW Daily
Apr 27, 2026
Your boy Hasan
Another left-wing lunatic tried to kill the president Saturday night, this time at the annual White House Correspondents’ Dinner. We don’t need to waste much time on the shooter, who somehow survived his gun fight with the Secret Service, or his motive, which is always the same (watches the news). But it’s worth noting the controversy over the mainstream left’s normalization of Hasan Piker, who just appeared in the NYT to defend stealing on account of capitalism is evil or something, and to once again justify the assassination of Brian Thompson on account of communists believe our healthcare system is, in some abstract way, itself violent. Unfortunately, the debate’s over. Hasan’s normalization is complete, and with it comes a carveout for violent left-wing rhetoric. Now, the only way out is through, and frankly I’m too tired of this shit to care. When the lunatics come for Hasan, I think I might just sit that conversation out.
The Deal Guys and Dario
Anthropic and White House officials recently had a “productive” meeting about bringing the company’s AI back into the government, per the NYT. This follows an epic clash that, late February, culminated in CEO Dario Amodei’s anxious midnight blogging sesh in which he called Trump a dictator after Pete Hegseth, upset about Dario’s previous anxious midnight blogging sesh, designated the company as a supply-chain risk. And it just goes to show… you can basically accuse the sitting president of pedophilia on Twitter (in Elon’s case, literally) and still come out the other side with something resembling a deal. Because what’s a little public shouting match to an admin of deal guys? It’s a whazy. It’s a woozie. It’s fairy dust. It doesn’t exist, man. It’s only on the elemental chart insofar as it advances a deal, baby. Chin up, Dario, darling. And maybe just lay off the blogs. You know, for now.
Bet on yourself
What’s the best day you’ve ever had? Whatever you’re picturing, Special Forces soldier Gannon Ken Van Dyke’s January 3rd crushes it. He won over $400,000 on Polymarket betting that Maduro would be out by January 31… a mission he personally helped plan and execute. Sweet! Unfortunately for Van Dyke, he is now having the worst day, because he just got arrested for it. President Trump mused that betting on the success, rather than failure, of the US military is not so bad, comparing Van Dyke to… Pete Rose, but admitted that “the whole world, unfortunately, has become somewhat of a casino.” And sure, we should work out the kinks on these online war slot machines, but until then… how can the common man do insider trading, Polymarket? Let me wager $100 parlays like, I don’t know, a certain Pirate Wires intern will pass out drunk on the lawn AND the girl he’s texting will block him by Saturday.
