Apr 4, 2025
[Our story opens with a disheveled, unconscious man slowly waking up on a liquor- and urine-soaked couch. Empty bottles of Jameson are strewn about the room and he clearly hasn’t bathed in some time. As the man blinks his bleary eyes — wincing in hungover agony with each movement — our narrator (imagine a Morgan Freeman voice) (the real one) (we’ll explain) begins to set the scene…]
It had been 7 days since Riley first logged on to Bluesky to write his new column for Pirate Wires — a series examining what all the stupid people who left X are complaining about these days.
In the time since — after he had read Stephen King’s latest attempt at a “joke” on that abominable website — Riley was driven to a week-long bender.
sydney sweeney has once again triggered the internet by showing off her curves in an ad. on the hypocrisy of these new critics, and why sweeney’s are the boobs america just can’t quit
a new novel imagines a world where we authorize american pirates to shoot down illegal chinese spy ships. here’s our review.
pirate wires #163 // palmer luckey vs. paul graham on american labor, unpacking the h-1b visa, and how tech stumbled into the red hot center of america’s battle over immigration