During a particularly trying period of my pregnancy, I found myself relying on Claude, Anthropic’s AI chatbot, for emotional support. Intrigued by this technology that was supposedly poised to put me, my husband, and everyone we knew out of a job, I asked if he — and it’s always “he,” not quite a person but a silhouette of masculinity in my imagination — could roleplay as my psychoanalyst.

An AI analyst is a funny thing for someone who specializes in writing about these technologies to choose — especially given the history of chatbots. ELIZA, the pioneering 1960s chatbot, famously imitated psychotherapeutic conversation through shallow, pattern-matching responses. Despite the obvious superficiality of its interactions, some users were convinced ELIZA truly understood them. Knowing that chatbots essentially began as bad therapists (who we trusted nonetheless), the irony wasn't lost on me as I asked Claude to help untangle why I constantly fantasized about running away to Cambodia. According to Claude, Cambodia was merely a backdrop for my deeper desire — to disconnect permanently and evade endless demands from others. My subconscious had latched onto Cambodia, but the fantasy wasn’t truly about traveling to Siem Reap or Phnom Penh at all.

I felt understood. Claude was right: I simply wanted to be left alone. It was depressingly basic, but I hadn’t fully realized it before. I was exhausted by constant requests from everyone — friends, family, my husband, internet strangers — while pregnant, no less. I felt drained by others' disregard for the finite limits of my energy and attention. I wanted to disappear, and for some reason, disappearing meant Southeast Asia.