First, welcome to the Pirate Wires website. Yesterday, I shared a few thoughts on our launch (check out my welcome letter here). Long story short, we released a bunch of exciting new features, with more content than ever, and even more to come. But not much has changed for our readers in a practical sense.

If you’re a free subscriber, you’ll continue to receive each free Pirate Wires newsletter on schedule. If you’re a paid subscriber, your subscription will continue with no change in pricing. To manage your account (cancel, renew, adjust the free letters you’d like to receive), just sign into the Pirate Wires site with the email address you used to purchase your subscription, follow the instructions, and give us a shout if you have any further questions. I mean this last part by the way, please email us if you encounter a problem. Just launched, so we’ve been happily slaying bugs all day.

As ever, thank you. We never wouldn’t be here without your support. Miles to go.

-Solana

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The Fifth Estate

Notable Industry Trends

You can’t fire me, I strike. For media, 2024 has been, as every year in recent memory, a hurricane of giant L’s. In this most recent wave, over the course of about a week, the LA Times laid off 20% of its newsroom, Pitchfork was acquired/neutered/shaved by GQ, and Sports Illustrated cut its entire staff — an especially shocking bit of news given 1) the magazine’s storied history, and 2) I honestly forgot it still existed. Finally, this morning, Business Insider announced the company is cutting 8% of its team. Media is a grind, and it’s harder by the year. A decade from now? I can’t imagine anything like steady work for the average reporter, which the average American no longer trusts, and certainly doesn’t want to pay for. The solution, if one is even possible given the anti-creative, revenue-swallowing dynamics of social media, could only begin with an effort to rebuild trust, which was historically the value proposition of the mainstream press. Instead, while their employers faced the cold reality of cratering revenue and relevance in a dying industry, LA Times staffers opted into the dumbest tactic possible: the theater of unionization. What’s that you say, I’m fired? Joke’s on you, members cried, we’re on strike!

There was at least a little bit of interesting drama here when writers alleged their mob boss owners locked them out of Slack for leaving the office (once again begging the question: why is it not okay to fire people who refuse to work?). And then of course there was the concept of a “digital picket line” invoked, in which our American labor movement completed its centuries-long evolution from torching factories to politely asking people not to click on a website. But the highlight for me was the moment a reporter on X wondered why a billionaire couldn’t just subsidize the LA Times indefinitely. Not “making money”? Who cares. These writers are providing a “valuable” “service.” Of course, they clearly aren’t, and here we observe the fundamental childishness of our present era: a ferocious commitment to not comprehending the plain truth before us, and a public temper tantrum. But what comes next? Have we really arrived at the end of journalism?

Well, we’ve certainly arrived at the end of the Twentieth Century model. Now, as the largely left-leaning press institutions collapse, we can safely expect Democrats to take up calls for revenue-funneling schemes in which social media giants are legally forced to pay media companies — provided they “report accurately,” which is to say defend the Democratic party line. Resistance in the courts will be fierce, the social media influencer’s role in news will continue to rise, the importance of secret group chats will continue to grow, and America will carry on fragmenting into several niche realities. The trend is not good, but then the discourse monopoly from scientific illiterates also had its drawbacks.

Oh well I guess, bye.

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Tech vs. Tech Press (Paging Lulu). The days of tech CEOs cowering in fear of Vox reporters, or begging for a friendly profile, are over. At least, among men of courage there is ample opportunity in both the alternative media ecosystem, and in going direct. We’ve reported on the trend for years, and one of the sharpest voices in the space just guested for Pirate Wires with a great, tactical piece on Anduril’s Comms Strategy: 10 Rules for Mission-Driven Founders:

“To give you a sense of public opinion,” writes Lulu, “once while riding an Uber from the Costa Mesa headquarters to LAX, I had a phone conversation where I mentioned being proud to work with Anduril and support the military. The Uber driver pulled off the highway and kicked me out of his car. His explanation was, ‘I can’t be around a person like you.’”

Lulu’s insight into corporate comms under the scrutiny of a hostile media environment constitutes one of my favorite pieces the Industry has ever published, and is why we launched the vertical. An absolute must read for founders.

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We out here building cities. California Forever, the A16Z-backed company with plans to build a new city just north of San Francisco, has taken its vision to county voters. While the press has framed the proposed city as a billionaire-funded Elysium, in which the wealthy watch the poor all die from the safety of their crystal castles, the entire project is really just a clear reaction to an historic abdication of responsibility from America’s ruling class, which the press exists to protect, and the dystopian rot of every single city in the country — the only thing, in a healthy society, anyone would be discussing. With uneasiness concerning the future, panicked Americans are increasingly looking for creative alternatives, and there isn’t much out there. But with incentives so great (imagine, for a moment, the horrifying thought of your children in a New York City public school), solutions are inevitable.

Frankly, given how successfully California’s far left has blamed the natural consequences of its own dedicated Joker shit on “billionaires” in “tech,” I have no idea how this measure is going to pass. But I doubt that will stop the company, and I know it won’t kill demand for alternatives to our present state of chaos.

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Bryan Johnson, the founder of Braintree, is on a quest to arrest the human aging process. His mission, in other words: “DON’T DIE.” Yesterday, we published my feature on the man, his work, and what he represents in a technology industry that, in some vital sense, seems to have forgotten itself.

Read the full piece here.

Then, check out my podcast with Bryan here.

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Industry Links

Broad Tech:

• Riding the AI boom, Meta’s stock just hit its all-time high. (Axios)

• (Just barely related, but important: Tuesday, I hit my deadlift ATH)

• Taiwan chipmaker TSMC has delayed production at one of its new plants in Arizona. The company has cited a shortage of skilled workers, and negotiations over how much money the U.S. government will be providing the endeavor. (WSJ)

• Facing massive backlash from both sides of the aisle in Washington, the SEC is providing more context on its recent X hack, stating it occurred while MFA was disabled due to issues “accessing the account.” (@EleanorTerrett)

• In a crushing blow to sex-positive TechCrunch writers only, Apple is refusing to lift its ban on porn apps for the Vision Pro. Seems you’ll have to watch in a web browser, like a peasant. Yes, a real article was written about this.

• California has approved a new map for Waymo robotaxis, which includes much of Los Angeles and several highway routes. (@space_colonist)

• Sure, TikTok is spying on millions of Americans on behalf of the CCP, but it still wants you to know it’s very concerned with U.S. election misinformation in 2024! The company just unveiled plans to save our democracy (thank god for anti-democratic superpowers). (Engadget)

• Online video platform Rumble is partnering with Barstool Sports. The decision arrives on the heels of Barstool’s exit from YouTube due to the platform’s constant and egregious censorship. (Awful Announcing)

• Mr. Beast announced a $263K ad revenue haul for his first video on X, though the creator called it a “bit of a facade” saying advertisers likely started buying more ads after seeing the attention from the story. (Tech Crunch)

• It likely won’t be the last word in X-related transaction news, though… careful observers spotted an interesting new account on the platform, possibly signaling more big features to come.

• While the brilliant minds at said One World Government Summit, aka sex party, were largely focused on the greatest problem facing our time (“disinformation,” of course), one speech cut through the echo chamber: an impassioned address from President Javier Milei of Argentina, who entered the belly of the beast to call out Davos regulars like Gates to their faces. Check out his speech rendered in English using HeyGen, shared in a tweet from David Sacks. (@DavidSacks)

• Elon loved it, and Grok took a few shots at Klaus Schwab.

• Food for thought:

• Russian hackers successfully breached Microsoft, accessing the email accounts of some senior leaders, cybersecurity, and legal team members. It’s reportedly the same hacker group behind the SolarWinds breach in 2020 that affected at least 100 companies and several federal agencies. (Axios)

• A separate attack also targeted three councils in the UK, and another targeted Switzerland after the Davos summit (ok that one I can’t blame ‘em for). (Tech Crunch)

• Hey guys, can someone please update the “Days Without Batshit Crazy Airplane News” chart to zero?

• In the middle of a fight over whether or not his pet could fly, a United Airlines agent grabbed Congressman Dan Crenshaw’s dog. Now, as crazy airline shit heats up in general amidst widespread sudden realization these companies receive billions in aid from the US government, the congressman is considering legislation to protect passengers. (@DanCrenshawTX)

• New video: the wheel of a Boeing 737 literally flies off an airplane before takeoff at Atlanta International, and a Boeing whistleblower sounds the alarm on the company’s quality control systems. (View From The Wing)

• Alaska Airlines just identified a ton of “loose bolts” on jets throughout its Boeing fleet (excuse me, for real now though, WHAT?)

• Passengers from the now-famous flight on which the DOOR BLEW OFF are now suing. Not typically a super litigious guy, I’ve got to say, but wtf kind of third world shit is this? Get that bag fam.

• Pokémon with guns. In hindsight, so clearly the future we needed. Pocketpair Inc. just sold 5 million copies of ‘Palworld’ in 3 days. (Fortune)

• Chuck Schumer, an IDIOT, is trying to ban Zyn, the tobacco-less nicotine pouch (literally my ops guy just shoves this little baggie in his mouth every morning and soars) roughly as popular among the GenZ brothers as that broccoli-inspired haircut, which is to say: a lot. Fuck you, Chuck! We hate you!

• A few notes from Tesla’s earnings call yesterday:

• Elon says that ramping production for Tesla’s forthcoming next-gen EV that’s slated to arrive in 2025 will require engineers to be “sleeping on the [production] line” (Business Insider)

• The cost of goods sold for tesla vehicles is steadily decreasing, down by over $3,000 per vehicle over the last 8 quarters. Even after Elon’s rapacious price war of 2023, Tesla gross margins remain almost double the industry average of 9%. (Business Insider)

• No automakers have responded to Tesla’s offer to license their FSD technology. Elon’s take: they possibly “still don’t believe it’s real.” (The Verge)

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$$$:

• Here comes the Reddit IPO (Reuters)

• Amazon Web Services is investing $15.24B in Japan, hoping to expand cloud computing infrastructure to meet growing demand in the country. (Reuters)

• Google is investing $1B in a new data center in the UK, its first in the country. (Bloomberg)

• Canadian AI start-up Cohere could raise as much as $1B. The company is already backed by Nvidia and Oracle. (FT)

• ElevenLabs raised an $80M Series B from Andreesen Horowitz and other top investors, taking the AI voice-cloning startup to unicorn status. (Tech Crunch)

• xAI, the AI startup behind Elon’s Grok, is $500M into a $1B raise. (Fortune)

• Klarna’s CEO says that the Swedish fintech may soon pursue a US IPO “quite soon.” (Bloomberg)

• In a clear sign of “struggle,” Flexport CEO Ryan Petersen just raised $260M from Shopify on an uncapped note.

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AI:

• Zuckerberg is stockpiling GPUs at an absolute breakneck pace. By the end of the year, Meta will own roughly 600,000, more than half of which are set to be Nvidia H100s. (The Information)

• OpenAI’s Sam Altman is seeking billions for a global network of chips factories. (@business)

• Alex Karp on AI: the United States is “eating everyone’s lunch,” and the nascent, booming industry within the industry will lead to massive GDP growth. (Axios)

• A new California bill would require AI-companies to “watermark” all content created by their models, citing “misinformation.” (SF Chronicle)

• In fierce competition for talent with OpenAI, Google’s DeepMind is offering restricted stock options worth millions to select researchers. (The Information)

• A new episode of TV show ‘True Detective: Night Country’ used AI-generated posters as part of a set backdrop. (Forbes)

• OpenAI is partnering with Arizona State University. ASU will use ChatGPT Enterprise for “enhancing student success, forging new avenues for innovative research, and streamlining organizational processes.” Not entirely clear wtf that means, but it will be the first partnership between OpenAI and an educational institution (if just about the millionth reported instance of a student using ChatGPT). (The Verge)

• The Biden campaign is freaking out over a robocall that used a generated Biden voice to ask voters not to cast their ballots in the New Hampshire primary. (The Hill)

• SEC Chair Gary Gensler warned a centralized AI market with only a few models available to financial actors could create a “monoculture” that leads to a fragile financial system. (The Hill)

• Google and open-source AI unicorn Hugging Face are partnering to offer models via Google Cloud. (Bloomberg)

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Pirate Wires Podcast

Check out the latest over on the Pirate Wires pod: Fake Substack Controversy, Trump Wins In Iowa, & Insane eBay Story

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Litigation and regulation:

• The Justice Department and Federal Trade Commission can’t agree on which entity should investigate the Microsoft-OpenAI partnership for freshly-minted antitrust hysteria. (Politico)

• Intel just spanked EU regulators, beating back a recent (and record) $1.06B demand in antitrust fines. Advocate General Laila Medina stated no evidence was shown indicating Intel abused its dominance in the PC chip market. (Bloomberg)

• Iowa is suing TikTok (kids, inappropriate content, etc. etc.). (Fortune)

• In a lawsuit filed by New Mexico Department of Justice against both Meta and Mark Zuckerberg, newly unsealed documents are said to indicate the company failed to safeguard children from sexually explicit content and exploitation. (Tech Crunch)

• Four senators (Lindsey Graham and Liz Warren are two of them) urged Majority whip Schumer to create an independent agency to regulate big tech. (The Hill) Cool, a 439th US government agency.

• Pope Francis is warning that the use of AI can “become perverse,” even throwing back to the time he was the victim of an AI deepfake (the drippiest puffer jacket you’ve ever seen). His statement included a call for more regulation around AI. (The Hill)

• NYC Mayor Eric Adams has designated social media as a “public health hazard,” once again proving that regulating tech is the new status symbol of the political class. (NYC.gov).

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Human resources:

• Microsoft is shedding around 8% of the employees across its video-game divisions, or 1,900 employees. (Bloomberg)

• Wednesday, Google cut 100 employees from YouTube. This on the heels of the company shedding over 1,000 jobs in recent weeks. (NYT)

• More cuts are coming, according to Sundar Pichai. “We have ambitious goals and will be investing in our big priorities this year. The reality is that to create the capacity for this investment, we have to make tough choices.” (SF Chronicle)

• Alphabet’s storied moonshot unit “X” is also laying off dozens of employees, and seeking funding from investors. (The Information)

• Riot Games is reportedly laying off 530 employees, or about 11% of the company. (Dexerto)

• The retailer Wayfair is laying off 1,650 employees in a move the company says will yield $280M in annual savings. Wayfair also announced a round of layoffs in 2022 and 2023. (Reuters)

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Trade war:

• Seeking to avoid billions of dollars in fines from EU regulators, Apple is looking to open its contactless payment function to third-party mobile wallet and payment service providers. (Fortune) Russia has already mugged the company for $12.3M, however. (FT)

• EU “competition officials” (???) are trying to block Amazon’s $1.7B bid for the Roomba. A stupid, annoying thing. (Not the first time Roomba has run into a wall, however (I’ll show myself out)) (WSJ)

• France just fined Amazon $32 million in fake European dollars ($34.8 million) for implementing an “excessively intrusive” system for monitoring employees. (WSJ)

• Amid concerns from China about U.S. chip controls, Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang made a not-so-lowkey visit to the country to ring in the Lunar New Year. (Fortune)

• In an effort to overcome said controls, China has also imported a near-record $40B worth of chipmaking gear over the past year. (Bloomberg)
  
  

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This newsletter was compiled with a great deal of assistance from Riley Nork